With thousands of people responding to the most recent outpouring of abuses, Dr. Debi Silber has a proven method for helping victims find peace and healing in the midst of their betrayals. With 27 years of health, mindset and personal development training and coaching this has enabled Dr. Silber to create a multi-pronged approach to help people heal (physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually) from the trauma of betrayal. See below: Five Steps to Overcome Betrayal & Live With Resilience
- Stage 1: OUT OF BALANCE: Disproportionately prioritizing your physical and mental state, while simultaneously neglecting emotional and spiritual health. This disconnect can explain why people who are betrayed often ask, “How did I not see it coming?” and blame themselves for the betrayal, although it’s important to know that there’s no blame meant here at all. Betrayal occurs because the betrayer chose to say or do something hurtful.
- Stage 2: BREAKDOWN: The breakdown of the body, mind, and worldview. Your stress response is ignited and this is where the betrayed experiences mental, emotional and physical symptoms more acutely. If you stay at this stage too long, illnesses, conditions, and disease will ensue. It’s the most frightening of all stages because your foundation has been shattered and a new foundation hasn’t yet been formed.
- Stage 3: SURVIVAL: Survival instincts are emerging. This stage is the most practical in figuring out how you will survive this experience. Decisions made are coming from a place of fear and pure survival. You are focused on where to live, how to make money, what to eat, taking care of the kids, etc.
- Stage 4: NEW NORMAL: Finding and adjusting to a new normal begins slowly. The old circumstance or relationship no longer exists as it was, and a new life, along with a new set of beliefs is slowly being created. It may not feel great yet but there is a measure of safety to slowly begin again.
- Stage 5: HEALING, REBIRTH, NEW WORLD VIEW: A beautiful stage which is centered on healing, rebirth and a new worldview. The body begins to heal; you’re more interested in self-care and in this stage, you not only pay attention to your mental and physical needs but also to emotional and spiritual needs too. You are worthy and expect to be treated in a manner that honors who you’re becoming.
So, what’s the first step to healing? First and foremost, you have to have a willingness to heal. My survey showed that 82% of those betrayed are actually wanting to move forward, but they don’t know how. Becoming your mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual best takes a commitment to do so. There’s a strategy involved in making sense and meaning of your experience so that you can make it a defining chapter of your story, and not your whole story. As you do, you’ll begin to feel calmer, more centered and in control. You’ll sleep better and feel more energetic, and because like energy attracts like energy, you’ll slowly gain momentum. You’ll begin to see new possibilities and new opportunities, and you’ll begin to make sense of the experience.
If you feel safe and valued, you become more willing to forgive the person so that you can move on or rebuild a new relationship with that person if you choose to. If you don’t feel safe and valued, you can clearly see the level of consciousness of your betrayer and choose to forgive (for your sake) without rebuilding the relationship. You want to set yourself free from the anger, the resentment, and the pain of the experience because you begin to realize how holding onto the pain is only hurting you.
You also begin to see the gift in the betrayal. As one of my mentors once said, “An experience, without the pain, is wisdom.” Your Post Betrayal Transformation allows you to see how much you’ve grown and changed. You can appreciate how much stronger you are mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually, and you know that it’s because you’ve transcended the pain and suffering betrayal causes.
Betrayal is more common than most people may think. According to my survey, 90% of those over the age of 35 have experience betrayal. Whether it was from a co-worker, friend, family member, partner or spouse, the pain and effects of betrayal are all too real. Fortunately, you no longer have to suffer, and you most certainly don’t have to do it alone. I’ve been there, and that’s why I opened the PBT Institute for healing and growth. Together we can transcend the pain of betrayal and you can become stronger mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually- the best version of you yet.
ABOUT DR. SILBER: Dr. Debi Silber, President/CEO of Debi Silber Companies, LLC. and founder of www.PBTInstitute.com is a recognized health, mindset, empowerment and personal development expert. Dr. Silber is the Life Crisis Rebuilder expert at TONE Networks and shares tips on how to heal from a life crisis and how to become an unshakeable woman. She’s a speaker, coach and author of the Amazon #1 Bestselling book: The Unshakable Woman: 4 Steps to Rebuilding Your Body, Mind and Life After a Life Crisis, The Unshakable Woman-The Workbook (the companion guide to the book) as well as two books recommended by Brian Tracy, Marshall Goldsmith, Jack Canfield and many more. After researching and conducting a Ph.D. study on how women experience betrayal from a family member or partner, Debi has discovered a predictable and proven process of taking women from betrayal to breakthrough. That process, coupled with 27 years of health, mindset and personal development training and coaching, enabled her to create a multi-pronged approach to help women heal (physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually) from the trauma of betrayal.
Debi understands the demands of the busy woman because she’s one too. Managing The Silber Center for Personal Growth and Healing along with the PBT Institute™ on Long Island, teaching, speaking, coaching, mentoring and writing, she’s also married to her husband Adam for 27 years, is the proud mom of Dani, Dylan, Camryn and Cole (22, 21, 18 and 16) and is the proud mom of six dogs, Scooby, Nike, Roxy, Gigi, Kylie and Brody.