Vinay Saranga M.D. is a psychiatrist and founder of Saranga Comprehensive Psychiatry. With permission I’m sharing his tips to help moms everywhere feel better this holiday season:
– Give yourself a break: Being a mom is a lot to take on, so first and foremost, give yourself a pat on the back for how well you have things together even if it doesn’t feel that way all the time. Chances are, you have your own personal and professional life to manage, and on top of that, raising kids is a tremendous amount of responsibility so don’t be so hard on yourself.
– Prioritize: Make a list or a schedule for the coming week of things that need to get done. Include appointments you need to be at, tests you need to help your kids study for, extracurricular activities, birthday parties your kids need to attend and more. Seeing everything for the upcoming week in front of you helps you prepare and stay organized.
– Make time for you: Being a mom can be a fulfilling experience, but it can also take a toll on you. That’s why all moms need to make time for themselves every day. Even 20 to 30 minutes of some quiet time will help you rest, relax and recharge. You can sit in a quiet place and do nothing, listen to music, read a book or whatever takes your mind off of things and reduce stress. This shouldn’t be seen as optional – it should be required for all moms.
– Delegate: This is especially true as your kids get older. Delegate the household chores and other responsibilities. There’s no reason that mom should have to do everything. Get your kids to pack their lunch, clean up their rooms, do the laundry, take out the garbage, etc.
– Understand the delusion of perfection: As a mom, you may strive for perfection. Perfection in your parenting style, perfection in your kid’s studies and grades, perfection in your cooking, perfection in your career, perfection in the gifts you get your children this holiday season and more. While it’s certainly great to want to be the very best you can be, don’t let perfectionism eat away at you.
– Discuss your feelings: Again, being a mom is a lot to handle. When it gets to be too much, don’t hold in your feelings because that’s not good for your mental or physical health. Find a friend or your spouse and speak about what you are feeling. You can also find a group of other moms who meetup to support one another. If you’re really not feeling like yourself, see a mental health professional to discuss what’s going on.
Let this time of year be a time of peace for you and your family. And, if something wasn’t checked off of your “To-Do” list why not make it a New Year’s activity instead? A new tradition! Have a lovely season.
Vinay Saranga M.D. is a psychiatrist and founder of Saranga Comprehensive Psychiatry. https://www.sarangapsychiatry.com/